Dinner’s at 6

Mom and children arrive home from a long day at work and at gramma’s, respectively.

Mom fills a pot with water and puts it on the stove to boil. This is all she manages before the children start needing attention.

Dad is outside mowing the lawn before the rains come.

Mom would very much like to play with the children but one of them (Son) is yelling very loudly and demanding food. Mom has a grand plan. She shows the daughter a Mystery Bag made of cream colored linen. “What do you think is in here?” She asks mustering all the fake enthusiasm she can. “I don’t know!” Daughter is intrigued and reaches for the bag. Thinking back to her favorite Home Schooler, Mom says, “Ok, but you can’t open it up! You can feel the outside and listen but you have to guess without peeking. Fun, huh???!”

Daughter puts one hand on the bag and declares, “Blocks.”

Mom makes a note that perhaps a thin linen bag is not the best Mystery Building Medium but trucks on: “Yeah! Blocks! Look they’re BIG alphabet blocks; like the ones you already have but BIG! Great Grampa got them for you and Brother. Cool, huh??!?!”

“YEAH!” Daughter is excited and even better, is all about showing her brother how to make towers and buildings.

Children now engrossed for at least 5 minutes, Mom runs to the kitchen and chops up zucchini and onion and saute them with some garlic in olive oil.

Dad pops in half-way through onion chopping and asks for a glass of water. We’ll assume he knew his wife’s tears were from the onion and not some deeper issue and that’s why he didn’t ask why she was crying and sniffling.

(He’d be right.)

During the next 20 minutes, Daughter makes up songs about Ewoks and home building and Mom finishes cooking dinner while oohing and aahing over Daughter’s tower, getting Son a cup of water, and trying not to make a giant mess.

(Too late.)

Mom sets the table and dishes everyone up a generous portion. Dad smells something that is definitely not dinner.

Dad changes Sons diaper. Son comes to the table sans pants.

At last it is dinner time and the family gathers for Zucchini and Pasta:

Son cannot get enough of the meal. Yells very clearly: “Ma-mA!” when Mom fails to keep food on his tray at all times.

Dad loves the meal and asks what the sauce is made of.

Mom is modest and names off the ingredients. Dad is impressed and happy.

Daughter asks to toast and clink.

Son yells and flails wildly sending pasta flying. Halts suddenly when his wee fingers grabs a piece of zucchini by mistake. Examines zucchini with scientific intensity before cramming it into his maw.

Daughter abruptly changes the topic of conversation from precipitation/evaporation to human anatomy: “Wait, ok, ok. If you and Jonas have penises and me and mommy have labias…” Mom and Dad wonder where this is going and Daughter queries with exasperation: “…what do we do with our butts??”

Dad chokes on his zucchini. Mom falls over into fits of laughter.

Son drinks his water.

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2 Responses

  1. i’m sucked in, will definately need to go get a zucchini from moms garden!

  2. hahaha! wasn’t expecting that!

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