Boy loves to shop

Jonas loves shopping. He loves sitting in the cart, throwing his head back and laughing at the balloons floating over the aisles. He loves pointing at the bananas and asking, “Mama?” He loves reaching for the giant bottle of balsamic vinegar when his mommy, stupidly, parks the cart in front of the mountain of glass vinegar bottles in order to keep him out of the way of the other people shopping for beans. He loves laughing at her silly voices as she push him quickly away from the “SHOULDN’T PARK YOUR BABY HERE” shelf (they really should put a sign there.).

He loves to throw the upper half of his body back over the cart seat and giggle when she pulls him back up again by his coat zipper. Over and over again as people smile at the goofy boy with the nap-mussed hair laughing his belly laugh.

He loves it when he’s in the check out line and his mommy remembers she’s making chili that night and has to go back to the bean aisle for three more cans. He loves perfecting his ninja skills by pulling a bottle of red wine vinegar to the floor because his mommy parked the cart in the exact same spot she parked him in just minutes before where she caught him reaching for the balsamic vinegar. He loves looking at her innocently when she says, “Jonas! It was 2 seconds! I turned my back for TWO SECONDS!” He loves ignoring the scent of red wine vinegar that wafts through the bean aisle while two employees discuss the best way to clean it up and his mommy looks all worried and concerned and all, “What now?”

He loves pointing at the mess on the floor and his mommy pushing him away with a muttered, “Let’s get the hell out of here before you get into anymore trouble.”

Jonas loves shopping.

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