I have to say a couple things

Bag Lady

Bag Lady

The other day I saw that Jaden was having another eczema break out on the back of her thighs. “Great,” I said and grabbed the topical steroid.

The following day (My birthday, thank you very much.) we saw that a ring had formed on her leg. “Great,” we all said (“we” being me, my mom, and MIL), “RINGWORM.” I called the after hours scheduling line and got an appointment for the following afternoon.

I picked up both kids after work and got to the clinic just in time for the appointment.

Then we waited for an hour before actually seeing the doctor. Part of me wondered if I’d made the appointment for an hour earlier, would I have arrived just in time to see the doctor and avoided all that waiting.

Mommy's heart swells

Mommy's heart swells

If that were the case I would’ve missed watching my super well behaved kids keep themselves entertained for an hour in a waiting room that had no toys and the only book available was a collection of children’s drawings on the subject of “how asthma makes me feel” whose cover was deceptively covered in a collage of crayons. I don’t blame Jaden for being disappointed.

Dr. Jaden

Dr. Jaden

Jaden did her part by making Jonas laugh hysterically by running up to him and crying “YAAAAAAAH!” in a big gruff voice. I wish I knew her secret. I’ve tried the “yah!” thing and all I got was a smile hidden by a pacifier.

She also resisted the urge to jump all over the chairs, encouraged as she was by my glare:

“Jaden, don’t jump on the chairs.”

“Oh. Sorry.” Raises up again on all fours.


She decided that the issue was not her jumping but rather me seeing her jump and so instructed:

“Don’t look at me when I’m jumping.”

“Yeah, it doesn’t work that way.”

Jonas contributed by not sensing that mommy was without any provisions of any kind and not demanding food or loading his diaper.

Finally we were in front of the doctor. Jaden was sitting on the exam table with her pants around her ankles and the doctor asked, “Jaden does your owie tickle, hurt, itch or a couple of those?”

Blue but not sad

Blue but not sad

Jaden sat up tall and said, “I have to say a couple things about my mommy.”

Oh dear god. What could she possibly say?

Now, I want you all to know that Jaden truly and honestly has nothing to say about either of her parents in the way of abuse. Nothing. We’ve swatted her behind two times and both times were very warranted and she didn’t even feel them. She’s much more hurt when we yell at her or put her on time out.

However, just because we AREN’T horrible parents, doesn’t mean she won’t SAY that we are.

With baited breath, I put on a smile and said, “What do you have to say, sweetie?”

She sat up a little straighter and declared: “I have to say that…I… love…my mommy.” Deep breath and relaxing on both our parts.

“Well, J, that’s a very nice thing to say. I love you, too.”

loves her some broccoli

loves her some broccoli


Then came the “exam”. Dr. Lady took one look and said, “Could be ringworm, but Eczema can also look like that. I’ll prescribe an anti fungal cream but if it doesn’t go away in two weeks, just go back to using her eczema steroid.”

Thank you very much, Dr. Lady. I opted against picking up yet another prescription and put on her steroid instead. Two days later: the circle and the surrounding blotchiness are nearly gone.

Oh well, at least the visit to the clinic will put us that much closer to paying off this year’s deductible, right?

Hey, I gotta look on the bright side sometimes.

Bored with the camera but no ringworm

Bored with the camera but no ringworm


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