Narrative in the Key of J

The other day we went for our first family walk in our new neighborhood (this was before the skies opened up and nature dumped crap loads of slush on our fair city). We were headed to the neighborhood pizza place which is less than a block away so it was a short walk but that’s ok because lord, do I need more comfortable shoes. Jaden was very excited to be outside and gave us a full report of our walk as it played out:

“Dat’s a pine cone. (points at a fallen pine cone) It come from dat tree.” (points to pine tree)

“Das a fas car! Dos are fas cars. Dey go vrooooooooooooooom.”

“I walking tilly.” (and she was walking silly. Almost bouncing along on the balls of her feet.)

“We got pitta and teesy bed. We go home and eat it.”

“We walking!”

And so on. Non-stop. Talk talk talk.

Then at home:

“You eat your pitta. I eat my teezy bed.”

“You have carrots on your pitta.” (I point out they’re not carrots, they’re tomatoes and ask if she’d like some carrots.)

“No. I eat my teezy bed.”

“I not yike carrots. I  yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuub teezy bed.”

“I pay outside??! I run! Run all around da yard.” (she never did go outside but the prospect of playing outside appealed to her greatly until she forgot about it)

“Where Pa-yee? Dat not Pa-yee! Pa-yee downstairs!” (No, she’s right here looking outside.) “She right here?? Yooking outside?? DERE’S Po-yee! She right here yooking outside.”

“I go wanna wadta moobie!” (translation: “I’d rather not watch a movie right now, thank you.”)

“I wanna wat da movie.” (translation: “I would like to watch a movie now.” Again, didn’t happen as she got distracted with something else.)

“I wok out!” (playing her drums now)

“I wok out wid you, daddy!” (and thus began the cutest jam session never captured on film)

“Oh, I sorry.” (me, “that’s ok. you didn’t mean to.) “Thank you!”

“It bedtime now?”

“No, I go wanna go potty!”

“nigh’night, daddy.”

“I yub you.”

“Da yittle girl!” (when asked what story she’d like to read. There are several stories about little girls in this collection we have so when I asked her which one she closed the book and pointed to the cover: “Dat yittle girl.”)

“I need gass a wader.”

“I need one more tip.”

“I yub you to-eber. I yike you to always. As yong as I’m yibbin, my baby you’ll be.” (we sing it every night together. She doesn’t say “for”, she says “to”. Even when saying “forever”.)

“I just paying wid yo hair.”

“Good night, mama.”

“I yub you.”


3 Responses

  1. You know what amused me the most…I didn’t need any translation whatsoever! You’ve got a little darlin’ there, a testament to her parents love and guidance.

  2. awe…that is my favorite book to read my kids!!!!

  3. She was Daisy again this morning only she announced it thusly:

    “We ducks today.” Outta nowhere. I was getting her tooth brush ready and she declared it. I think animorphing has officially become part of our morning routine.

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